This is my third attempt at writing today’s post. You’d think with the world stripped down to a small piece of truth, that simplicity would be the order of the day.
For now, five months into the storm, life is chaotic for two very dear and beloved extended family members, one of whom was diagnosed with a brain tumor in May. Jimmy and I have stepped into the eye of that storm for the next six weeks, until Thanksgiving. To quote Santosh Kalwar, “If life is a journey then let my soul travel to share your pain.”
The pain is palpable, at times both beautiful and gut-wrenching; quite often regret fills the void left by broken dreams. The color of sadness often seeps into the day, and into the conversation. I wake at night feeling I might drown, the cracks in my heart filling with sorrow.
I am happiest while doing, caring and sharing. Busy brings me comfort. I am not alone in my approach to this new reality. We are all very busy; with doctors and denial, with appointments and disappointments, with collaboration and chaos. There is grace in the giving, and in the receiving; and so much beauty with all the clutter of life stripped away.
Each fragile new day feels so exquisite. The truth of the matter - the moments shared honoring the life that hangs in the balance is truly a precious gift.
In all honesty, I don't know how often I’ll be able to post over the next six weeks. I'm aware there is much I don't know. I hope you'll understand and keep us all in your prayers.